Worst games and apps ever

[Cohaagen]

Limewire
Bloated, slow, buggy, ineptly-written garbage. Groaning with spyware and viruses like a dead seal alive with maggots. What sort of fuck thought it'd be a good idea to write a P2P programme in Java? Jesus wept! Utorrent shows 'em all how it's done, ya' rass.

Norton Antivirus
Another classic piece of overpriced bloatware. I think this is the only piece of software ever to make me punch through a medicine cabinet. Not even the most fiendishly obtuse moments of Beneath A Steel Sky ever provoked such aggression.

Soldier of Fortune
Tasteless rubbish.

America's Army
I've never played this, not that it matters. Even from a distance I can tell that it is utterly vile.

XCOM: Enforcer
When I saw what had become of the XCOM series, I wept for my lost childhood.

I can think of lots of others, but right now I'm slipping into an indulgent melancholy and am dabbing some tears away with my maroon paisley cravat in a dignified manner. I might pour a big glass of brandy as they do in films.

[Colonel John Matrix]

Windows. An easy target, I know, but Windows XP starts off working fine, but after less than a year it starts getting more and more sluggish and unstable. I got so pissed off I decided to try Ubuntu...will have to spend a bit of time trying to get my wifi card and external sound card working with it (or not), shame it doesn't work off the bat as easily as Windows, but hopefully I might free myself from Microsoft.

I could rant on a bit more about Microsoft if you want...I'm constantly amazed how they can spend so much time, effort and money to make such mediocre software. For example, a while ago I had some malware on my PC. Windows Malware Removal Tool couldn't even see there was a problem. Some program I downloaded, that was probably made by some lonely geeks for a hobby, managed to fix the problem easily.

[abortiondinner]

This game:

[Colonel John Matrix]

What the fuck? That title screen looks like something Piss Ant Soldier would be ashamed to create in MS Paint

[weylandyutani]

Nov 4, 2008 15:45:19 GMT -5 abortiondinner said:

This game:

Is this a joke?

If not I may need to find this game and play it.

[Wildey]

It's real alright. I especially like the amazing grammar. And the fact it was actually made in 1997.

[Colonel John Matrix]

Microsoft Office Word is currently trying my fucking patience. I'm sitting at my desk, quietly fuming thinking things like "Why did you fucking change that font? I didn't ask you to change the fucking font! Arrgghhhh!!"

You could probably (correctly) argue that a lot of the problem is down to my lack of understanding of Word, but I prefer to jump on the "blame M$" bandwagon. Fucking M$.

[Colonel John Matrix]

So, after about 2 weeks of using Ubuntu (a version of Linux) instead of Windows, I'm getting pretty close to giving up. Ubuntu tries to sell itself as "Linux for humans", claiming that it's a version of Linux that a fairly computer-literate Joe Average (like me) can run. It's probably my intense apathy towards Windows that has kept me going this long.

Okay, it's not been all bad. It does run nicely, and it will do virtually everything I need it to do just great. However, as you all know, computers don't ever work according to plan. My external soundcard didn't work at all. "Not to worry!", Linux users will say, "there's a whole community of folk out there who can help, and probably the solution to your problem is probably already listed on some message board thread!".

Which is true, except the catch is that despite what some folk will say, Linux is made by geeks, for geeks. If you want help, the level of assumed knowledge is way above what your average person who is used to Windows has.

For example, I wanted to install a simple bibliography database software package. Download a file, double-click it and install it, easy, right? WRONG!!!

Here's the installation instructions:
* Ubuntu must be breezy release or latter
* Add the following lines to your /etc/apt/sources.list

## Bibus
deb switch.dl.sourceforge.net/sourceforge/bibus-biblio ./
deb-src switch.dl.sourceforge.net/sourceforge/bibus-biblio ./

* Download the public key with the following command:

wget -q switch.dl.sourceforge.net/sourceforge/bibus-biblio/pmartino.gpgkey -O- | sudo apt-key add -

* sudo apt-get update
* sudo apt-get install bibus libsqliteodbc python-pysqlite2 python-wxgtk2.6 python-uno
* if you run Gutsy, there is a problem with "LD_LIBRARY_PATH", to solve it

- gedit bibus
- copy the following lines in the editor

#! /bin/sh
export LD_LIBRARY_PATH="/usr/lib/openoffice/program"
exec /usr/share/bibus/bibus.py

- sudo rm /usr/bin/bibus
- sudo cp bibus /usr/bin
- sudo chmod +x /usr/bin/bibus


* make bibus and openoffice communicate (not required since Dapper):

- sudo ln -s /usr/lib/openoffice2 /usr/lib/openoffice
- sudo ln -s /usr/lib/openoffice2/share /usr/lib/openoffice2/user


* optional:
o apt-get install openoffice.org2
o apt-get install mysql-server mysql-common mysql-client python-mysqldb

Understand any of that? No. Me neither. And guess what? It didn't install even though I followed that as best I could. Yippee!!!

Probably about to go back to XP this evening. It's a virus and malware ridden over-bloated pile of pish, but at least it fucking runs everything I need without me having to frantically type in computer code like I'm trying to hack into the fucking Matrix.

Realistically, for Joe Average, the only alternative to Microsoft Windows is Apple.

[Will Da Beeste]

The worst game I have ever played is The Thing on PS2.
It is impossible to even get past the first room!